Recently
a friend of mine, Jennifer, reached an impasse in a
relationship. She has dated Brad for over two years, hoping to
eventually marry him. Yet they had a serious talk, and Brad
conceded that even though they are both in their mid-thirties,
he isn’t ready yet for a lifetime commitment. While he
didn’t rule out the possibility at some future point, he
knew he wasn’t ready for marriage at this time.
Although Brad’s response was far from a full-scale
rejection, it flew like a mountain of sand in the face of
Jennifer’s expectations for the relationship and seemed to
her like a death sentence. Worst of all, she felt cursed by
the heavens. “I just don’t understand the hand of God in
this,” she complained. “I’ve never been in a
relationship where I’ve tried more diligently to honor God
and follow his principles. And it seems that God has given me
so many reasons for hope during the time I’ve dated Brad.
But now it appears he has simply set me up to shoot me down. I
just don’t believe that God has dealt fairly with me.”
Jennifer’s feelings of discouragement are only too
understandable. Disappointments in relationships are among the
most painful experiences we suffer. There are few of us who
wouldn’t feel dejected in similar circumstances. Yet her
hurt was intensified by the conclusions she reached about
God’s role in what happened. She read these circumstances to
mean that God had turned against her; worse still, he was
treating her unjustly.
I talk with many Christians who have fallen into an outlook
similar to Jennifer’s. They’ve concluded God is
unconcerned with helping them, even that he wishes to punish
and harm them. Sometimes such thinking is merely
temporary--part of the catharsis of coming to terms with a
personal loss. Yet all too frequently it becomes an abiding
way of interpreting what God is doing in their experience.
The tragedy is that when we conclude that God isn’t
treating us fairly in one situation, it’s only a small jump
to thinking he cannot be trusted with anything else. Optimism
about our future fades, and we lose the courage to take steps
of faith. I find this to be the state of affairs with numerous
Christians today, even some with considerable doctrinal
understanding. When it comes to considering the role of God in
their lives, they get locked into pessimism.
Half-Empty or Half-Full?
There are exceptions, though, and some truly inspiring ones
at that. Consider the experience another friend, Nelson,
recently shared with me.
As Nelson was pulling into a parking space at his office in
Washington
,
D.C.
, a rear tire dropped off of his car. Just one week before,
while he was visiting his family in
Illinois
, an auto clinic had overhauled the axle. Now Nelson faced the
unhappy prospect of hassling with a repair facility 600 miles
away that had done shoddy work--and the likelihood of another
costly repair here in
Washington
. Not to mention the aggravation and expense of finding
transportation in the interim, since he was bereft of his only
car.
Nelson’s instinctive reaction was not anger but awe. “I
was astounded to think that I had driven all the way from
Illinois
with a faulty axle and nothing happened,” he said. “If it
had snapped at high speed on an interstate, I could have been
killed.” He then added, almost as an afterthought, that he
found it impossible to feel much anxiety over how he would
afford another major repair. “The same God who protected my
life in this incident will provide the money needed to fix my
car,” he explained.
Both Jennifer and Nelson experienced significant personal
setbacks that led them to reflect about God’s purpose in
what had happened. But while Jennifer concluded that God had
turned against her, Nelson assumed God had done him a favor.
Their conclusions could hardly have been farther apart.
I should hasten to say that I don’t condemn Jennifer for
her reaction. She’s making the effort to think things
through from the standpoint of her relationship with Christ,
and I admire her honesty. She’s a new Christian, and with
her openness to expressing honestly what she’s thinking and
feeling, she may well work things through to a more positive
perspective.
Yet while I respect Jennifer’s way of thinking, I envy
Nelson’s. His is the sort of intensely hopeful outlook that
I long to have characterize my own life and wish to hold out
as a role model to others.
One reason I envy Nelson’s manner of thinking is that I
know the benefits this sort of outlook brings. When we’re
viewing God’s work in our lives optimistically, we feel
encouraged; our anxieties are lifted, we regain a sense of
hope, we start seeing hidden serendipities in otherwise
frustrating circumstances. Often, too, we see solutions to
problems that seem insurmountable when we’re thinking less
optimistically.
The effects of this optimism spill over into many areas of
our lives. Nelson’s experience with the car has even had a
positive effect on the way he looks at relationships. Though
he recently went through a difficult breakup, he’s viewing
the situation positively now, convinced that God kept him from
a lifetime commitment with someone who wasn’t compatible
with him. “I’m confident that a God who loves me this much
will provide for my relationship needs too,” he added. This
confidence has spurred him to become more active socially, and
he’s seeing opportunities for relationships that he hadn’t
recognized before.
A Basis for Optimism
But while I envy Nelson’s perspective because of its
benefits, I admire it most of all because it seems to
represent so well the attitude of heart that the Scriptures
term faith. Throughout the Bible we’re urged to view
God and his involvement in our lives through the eyes of
faith. Though the concept of faith is never defined precisely
in Scripture, it always seems to imply optimism--even blazing
optimism--about what God is doing in our experience. The basis
for this optimism includes not only the facts of Christ’s
salvation, forgiveness and empowering, but also the fact of
God’s protection and provision in our lives individually.
The Scriptures stress that he is working out a distinctive
plan for each of us, with our best interests and his highest
intentions in mind. To say the least, this is a basis for
considerable optimism.
This isn’t to say that optimism in Scripture knows no
bounds. The Bible has plenty to say about the other side of
the coin and never comes close to a
“don’t-worry-be-happy” philosophy. Grief has an
important place and is even recommended when one is coming to
terms with a major loss (Acts 8:2). We’re warned against
falling into unrealistic fantasies that keep us from taking
proper responsibility for our lives (Judg 18:27; 2 Thess
3:6-13). And we’re urged to respect the power of sin and to
fear the inevitable consequences if we cave in to its
enticements. The man who’s considering an affair with
someone else’s wife will be served well by a healthy dose of
pessimism (Prov 7:6-27). So will the woman who’s convinced
she can achieve salvation by her own efforts (Rom 3:23).
Still, when it comes to considering the work of God in our
lives as Christians, the accent in Scripture is strongly on
optimism. This optimism is at the heart of what the Bible
means by faith.
Scripture minces no words in stressing that faith is
central to our ability to relate to God on every level. It’s
hard to exaggerate the emphasis given to the need for faith in
Scripture. Next to the triumph of grace, the importance of
faith is the most significant and pervasive theme in the
Bible. While we are saved by grace, it is grace through
faith (Eph 2:8; Rom 3:22-25; Rom 5:1; Gal 3:26; 2 Tim
3:15). We’re called not merely to obey God but to the
obedience of faith (Rom 1:5; 16:26; Heb 11). It’s
through faith that we become righteous before God (Rom 3:22;
Phil 3:9), enjoy a personal relationship with Christ (Eph
3:17), are enabled to pray effectively (Eph 3:12), and become
able to understand otherwise puzzling matters of doctrine (Heb
11:3). We experience God’s protection through faith (1 Pet
1:15) and put ourselves in position to enjoy all of the other
benefits that he extends to us (Gal 3:22; Heb 6:12).
Indeed, the writer of Hebrews states it most inclusively in
saying, “Without faith it is impossible to please God”
(Heb 11:6).
Transferable Faith
Given the extraordinary extent to which Scripture extols
faith and our need for it, it is important for us as
Christians to give close and frequent attention to what an
attitude of faith is and to whether our life is reflecting it.
Far too often our instinctive reaction to challenges is like
Jennifer’s rather than Nelson’s. We each have an ongoing,
chronic and desperate need for the rekindling of our faith and
for experiencing the optimism that faith inspires.
But how do we do it? It’s here that Nelson’s example is
so instructive. He followed a simple line of reasoning: If God
has proven trustworthy in one circumstance, he can be trusted
in another.
I’m certain that this ability to
transfer the lessons learned from one experience to another is
at the heart of all successful living. This principle is the
basis for the counsel offered by Richard Bolles in his classic
job-seeking manual, What
Color Is Your Parachute?. Bolles urges us to see our
skills as “transferable.” If you’ve been successful as a
waiter, for instance, you’ve learned abilities that can be
employed in more challenging situations. You’ve developed
interpersonal and communication skills that could be used in
management or teaching positions.
Just as we need to see our talents as transferable, we also
should regard our experiences of faith as being so. We should
strive to remember the lessons learned about God’s
faithfulness in one situation and apply them in new
circumstances. While this may seem to be an elementary point,
it’s not at all natural for us to think in this way.
Consider that on numerous occasions Jesus had to re-teach his
disciples lessons they had already learned and should have
been applying in new situations. Thus, when crossing a lake
they were desperately concerned about where their next meal
would come from, even though they had helped Jesus
miraculously feed a crowd of thousands of people earlier that
same day (Mk 8:14-21)!
On the positive side, David is an inspiring example of how
the lessons of faith can be transferred from one situation to
another in his decision to fight Goliath. He assumed that God
would give him success because of the protection he had
experienced in shepherding. “The Lord who delivered me from
the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will deliver me
from the hand of this Philistine,” David concluded (1 Sam
17:37).
This is the manner of thinking we need to apply to all the
challenges we face. This is the sort of thinking that’s at
the heart of authentic faith. For each of us it boils down to
an exceedingly encouraging point: The same God who has
supported us in the past, who met the needs of those in
Scripture, who faithfully takes care of so many people whom we
know--this same God will protect us in all our challenges and
provide for us as we take steps of faith. There is scarcely a
more significant thought we can grasp than this. Let us take
great encouragement from it and be inspired to live
courageously.
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